Updated: Oct 15, 2020
I am reading a book now called Present Over Perfect by Shauna Niequist. It's a call to action to leave behind frantic for a simpler, more soulful way of living. The forward by Brene Brown says it's "an open-armed invitation to welcome the people we love, and even ourselves, back into our lives." This statement gave me a visual of someone holding up a sign saying "welcome back to your life Emily" and I immediately felt a peaceful rest flood my spirit.
For a decade I served as Founder and Exec. Director of a nonprofit working with sex trafficked teenage girls. I was only 29 years old when this organization was birthed. I was a mom with two small children. I had no clue what I was getting myself into and thankfully God was so gracious in allowing me to only receive a glimpse of what He was calling me to do. It was on the side of a mountain I heard Him speak so clearly about this calling. It was an invitation to join Him in an exciting adventure. It was a chance to see the impossible become possible. It was an opportunity to welcome His beloved daughters home.
Somehow along the way, while I was continuously testing limits and gasping for grace, I lost myself. I became addicted to the tyranny of the urgent. I was caught up in the glorification of busyness. My boundaries had become clouded under the mirage of not having a choice. At some point along the way, the adventurous romance of welcoming His daughters home turned into me losing my own way home. I had lost my identity for the sake of the cause. I had surrendered to the hamster wheel life.
Can you relate? Are you living the hamster wheel life? Do you need to be welcomed back into your own life?
I have been on a journey to intentional living with focus on the simpler, more soulful way of living Shauna describes in her book for two years now. It's been incredible. You know that feeling you get when you eat to much and you unbutton your jeans and let it all hang out? It's even better than that! It's one long exhale.
When you hop off the hamster wheel, it takes some time to become stable. You feel a bit uneasy because you are so used to going round and round. But soon, you realize off the wheel you have choices. Choices are so fun!!! You can go right, left, up, down, sideways, or just lay down and go no where at all!
I have heard it said that the best journey's always lead us back home. For me, home is not a physical place. It's a state of mind. It's a place where I am free to be me, just as God made me. It's an exciting place because I get to say "what today Lord do you have for me" and no two days are the same (unlike the wheel). It's a place where I choose what to do with my time, my energy, and my rest.